


Someone To Fight For

by maryahspuns



Category: The Last of Us
Genre: Ellie - Freeform, Joel - Freeform, Maria - Freeform, Other, Sarah (Flashbacks), Tess (Flashbacks), Tommy - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-27
Updated: 2017-08-02
Packaged: 2018-11-19 15:41:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11316471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maryahspuns/pseuds/maryahspuns
Summary: Hey everyone! So I decided to restart my story, and it's about what happens from the time Joel saves Ellie in the restaurant to the first cutscene we get of Spring. Enjoy!





	1. You're Safe Now

She wouldn't stop. She wasn't planning to. She kept hacking away at a man's face, no, not a man, a monster. One that would haunt her forever. She knew he was dead, but she wasn't quitting. She would pay him back for the things he tried to do to her. The things he made her endure.  
And then, she felt his warm hands wrap around her waist, pulling her small fragile body into him. She knew who it was, but she wasn't taking any chances.  
"Ellie!"  
She tried, in an awkward motion, to reach for her switchblade and push him away. "NO!"  
"Shush, shush."  
"No! Don't fuckin' touch me!"  
Her voice was strained. She could feel tears building up in her eyes, and her throat resisting the urge to cry.  
"Stop! Stop! Look!"  
She didn't look. She pushed him away, looking for the machete, not daring to make eye contact. It would break her.  
"No..."  
"Look! It's me! Look, look, it's me."  
She took a deep breath in, her voice quivering, and breaking. "He tried to-" And again, her inhale sounded like a desperate cry for help.  
He knew exactly what she needed in that moment and time. He wrapped one hand around her back, and used his other hand to comfort her head. He brought her small frame to his large body, trying to encompass her in his parental love. He wanted her to feel safe in his arms, and more importantly, soothe her.  
"Oh, baby girl."  
He had never said those words to anyone besides Sarah. He let them slip out of his mouth in desperation to comfort her. But, was it really desperation? Did Joel truly love someone he told himself he wouldn't? He did. In that moment, Joel realized how much he needed this little girl. She did, in fact, save his life after all.  
He pulled her closer, yearning to feel her heat and warmth. Ellie was crying, but she was comforted in Joel's flannel and jacket. He made her feel safe, even if she was in the same room where she had almost been killed.  
She didn't want to leave her spot, forever wanting to be hugging Joel. But, he eventually pulled away. He looked into her pale green-blue eyes, seeing a broken soul. Her eyebrow were furrowed and she seemed to be in a lot of pain.  
He told her, "I'm here now. I won't leave you alone again. Okay?"  
She looked down to the floor, seeing blood and pieces of human flesh scattered everywhere. She looked back into his hazel eyes, and nodded. They stood up together, and walked out of the restaurant, leaving it to burn along with everything else in it. Including him.  
___________________________________________________________  
She held onto his arm, not wanting to let go. The cold bit the tips of their noses and gently brushed along their flushed cheeks. He didn't mind that she was holding onto him, in fact, he enjoyed her company. They were reunited for the first time throughout the harsh winter, and neither of then were planning on separating again. It was hard to see in blizzard, but they made their way back to where Ellie kept Joel safe. When they entered the house, she let go of his hand. She walked downstairs and laid herself on the floor. Joel frowned, his lips uncontrollably turning upside down. He hated seeing her in pain. He cleared his throat, and called her name softly.  
"Ellie?"  
It took her awhile to respond, as it was clearly visible she was crying. She choked an answer through tears, and said, "Yes?"  
Her voice was cracking. It was so delicate.  
He closed his eyes and took a deep breathe. "I'm gonna go get supplies to make a fire, alright? You reckon you can stay here by your lonesome for awhile?"  
She ran up the stairs, tears dripping down her cheeks. "No! No please don't go!" She ran into him, immediately wrapping her skinny arms around his stomach.  
"Please don't leave me alone," she cried. "Please don't go..." Her voice trailed off. She was getting comfortable again, relaxing her body while she held onto him.  
He didn't wrap his arms back around her, he was too nervous. He had forgotten what affection and love had felt like a long time ago. He pushed anyone away he thought was getting too close.  
"Ellie, I'll be right back. Just- Just, stay here. I promise I won't be long."  
She let go, realizing his rejection to hug her back. She drooped her head, and he realized what he had done. He rubbed her back and held her chin. "You'll be fine."  
She wiped her eyes, and nodded. "Okay."  
She went back downstairs, and laid on the bed injured Joel had once laid on. She curled up into the towel pillow, and realized it smelt like him. She became comfortable again. It was like everytime she felt the presence of Joel, or he was even mentioned, she relaxed.  
Her eyes closed, and she started to fall asleep. Joel came back into the house with sticks and other materials that were burnable. He light a fire in the basement with his match and felt the room instantly become warm. He noticed Ellie was sleeping, and smiled to himself. He chuckled in his throat, and she turned over.  
'Shit. I woke her up.'  
"Hey. What's up, Kiddo?"  
She sat up and rubbed her eyes. "You made a fire."  
Her eyes started to crystallize, and he saw it.  
His voice became soft. "Yes, yes, I did."  
She looked down, and tears trickled down her face, cleaning the dirt and grit off of it. She looked back up at him, and started to intensely sob. Even with the fire, she didn't feel warm. She felt uncomfortable. She wanted to be back in Joel's arms.  
He froze, unsure of what to do. He wanted to hug her, but he promised himself he would never become attached to anyone.  
'Look at her, Joel. She's fucking suffering and you're just going to let her be in pain? What if this was Sarah?  
BUT SHE'S NOT SARAH.  
You're attached to her, Joel, admit it.'  
"C'mere."  
He beckoned her over to where he was sitting, and held out his arms. She ran to him, practically throwing herself onto him.  
She sobbed violently, he was worried a hunter or infected might hear.  
He held her, just like he would with Sarah. "Oh, babygirl. It's okay. It's okay. I gotcha, you're alright."  
Her loud sobs became soft sniffles and her eyes heaved. She was getting tired, and she fell asleep in Joel's arms. He looked at her, and pet her hair. He frowned, and a paternal urge clouded over him. He wanted to take care of her. He wanted to make sure she was emotionally stable. He looked down at her again and cringed at all the blood and dirt covering her baby face. He grabbed a cloth from his backpack, and some water from his canteen. He cleaned her face gently, making sure he didn't wake her up.  
When he was done, the rag was completely covered in dirt, grime, blood, and skin. He was disgusted, but who was he kidding? He has had worse on his body.  
And then, he was filled with rage. He saw the marks on her face, the deep gashes, the black and blue around her nose, bruises, and more importantly, the hand marks around her neck. He growled at that excuse for a human being. The things he would've done to that man if he was still alive. He would make him suffer for hurting his-  
A thought danced around in his mind. Was he really about to say it? Was he really about to claim Ellie as one of his own? He wanted to deny her. He tried to. But, after calling her BabyGirl, a name he would only give to Sarah, and realizing how much he truly needed her, he gave up on trying. He looked at her as a daughter, and they both knew that. No matter how much they tried pushing it away.  
Joel would make David suffer for hurting his Ellie.  
For laying his hands on her.  
For making her in pain.  
He ground his teeth together. He would never, EVER let anyone touch her again.  
He put her back on the mattress as he laid on the floor. She wiggled around, squirming, as if she was getting a nightmare. It happened so suddenly, as if Joel drove them away. HE was her comfort. He was what made her strong.  
She woke up sweating. "Joel?!"  
She looked over and saw him sound asleep. Hot tears streamed down her cheeks, looking at the one person she cares about more than anything having his back turned to her.  
There he was, sleeping, peacefully, as if he didn't have the weight of the world on his shoulders.  
She carefully walked over to him and shook him gently. "Joel? Please wake up..."  
He didn't.  
"I-"  
Exposing her feelings was a completely new territory for her. She had never explored it before, because either no one cared for her or no one stayed around long enough.  
"I need you. I need you to wake up. Please. I'm scared."  
She shook him harder, but still being gentle.  
"I had a bad dream. Please. Please wake up, I need you."  
He finally woke up to see Ellie standing over him, looking him in the eyes. She was an emotional mess.  
"Joel- Oh, God... I- He tried to-"  
He closed his eyes shut trying to process the pain she was going through.  
She wanted to sleep in his arms. There was no other way she would feel safe and protected. No other way the nightmares would leave.  
"He tried to hurt me. Again..."  
He looked at her, and sat up. "Listen to me, darlin', and listen carefully: He ain't ever gonna hurt you again, I'm here now, and no one can take me away from you. Ya' understand?"  
She bobbed her head up and down slowly.  
He grabbed her cheek and rubbed it with his thumb. Although his hands were rough, she became eased and relaxed. She felt safe again. "Can I lay down with you?"  
The words slipped out of her mouth like nothing. Realizing what she said, her face turned bright red. "I- Um... I didn't mean-"  
"Yes. Yes you can. If it makes you feel better, yes you can."  
She couldn't help but smile. She dove into his arms and cuddled with him. He eventually moved to mattress, still with his little Ellie in his arms. She smiled, feeling her emotional trauma slowly disintegrate.  
The words that slipped out of his mouth next were shocking, both to him and her.  
"Goodnight, Babygirl."


	2. A Sense of Recognition

Her eyes went wide and she turned around to look at him. His cheeks became flushed and he could feel his heart beating fast. He cleared his throat, "Go to bed, Ellie. We'll leave tomorrow. We're traveling to Mississippi, and you need the rest to venture out there. Reckon we'll be out for quite sometime. Sleep well."  
She nuzzled into him, completely covering herself in his warmth. She became upset when she realized he didn't wrap his arms around her. He just let her be.  
She was getting angry with the fact he wasn't caring for her the way she thought he would. She inched herself away from him, and turned her back to him. She silently started crying. She wanted to be taken care of, but Joel was not accepting her.  
He noticed her moving away from him, and felt terrible for not being the support Ellie so desperately needed.  
He sighed, and closed his eyes. "I'm sorry." His voice was gruff and deep, signifying he was tired.  
She nodded her head, meaning she understood. She thought it would be best if she stayed away from him, seeing as he didn't want anything to do with her.  
Which, to her surprise, was quite the opposite. Joel wanted to nurture her like Sarah, he wanted to hug her and call her names he would only call his daughter. He cares for Ellie, he knows he does.  
He sat up straight and leaned his back against the cold wall. He could hear her lightly snoring, yet mumbling something under her breath. He couldn't make out what she was saying, but he knew it was the factor of a nightmare.  
_____________________________________  
 _She was running. Faster than she ever ran before. She was trying to keep up with him. Trying to run away from the monster who was lurking behind her. She tripped, and fell on her face._  
"JOEL! WAIT-"  
It started clawing at her legs. She let out a whimpered cry, trying to kick its hand off of her. Problem was, she couldn't see it.  
"LET GO YOU PIECE OF SHIT!"  
She kicked harder, but still, it was getting her no where. It dragged her by the leg, and as she tried clawing at the floor to get some grip, she could hear Joel running. Running to her. But, when he finally got close enough, she saw he was just another monster too. He grabbed her by the neck, and held her face close to his. He started choking her. Her small fingers tried to pry his grip off of her. "St..." She was refrained from talking. She couldn't say a sentence even if she tried.  
She could feel the lack of oxygen starting to affect her. She became weak, and her eyes rolled back. She passed out.  
When she woke up, she was tied to a table, nude. She struggled, but she knew it was no use. She saw his face.  
That petrifying face that shook her little body to the core. It sent shivers down her spine, and made her nauseous. He grabbed her neck, "You can try begging."  
Tears rolled down her face.  
"You have no idea what I'm capable of."  
"You think you know me? HUH?"   
"Well, let me tell you somethin'."  
And the moment she was afraid of, happened. He started thrusting into her small frame, and she let out a scream.  
___________________________________  
She woke up, screaming. She was covered in sweat and tears. Joel jumped up, and looked at Ellie.   
"No... No!" She cried. "He did it..." She whispered. "THAT FUCKING LOW LIFE BASTARD!"  
"El-"  
"No! Fuck you, Joel! You don't even want to help me! You don't even care! Just fucking deliver me to the Fireflies! I'm just a burden to you! AREN'T I?"  
She started crying in her hands, but, it was silent. She tried to hide it from Joel. She was learning to accept his negligence for her.   
Joel felt extremely upset with himself.  
'You're a terrible father, Joel. Did Sarah feel this way? How many issues and problems did she have that she didn't talk to you about? You're abandoning her. Help. Her.'  
"Ellie. C'mere."  
She looked up, and let out an intense sob. "Joel..."  
"C'mere, Baby, c'mere."   
She ran over to him faster than she ever could. Their bodies collided and Ellie held onto him tightly, shaking and wishing her nightmares would end.  
Joel wrapped his arms around her back, digging his face into her small shoulder. "It's okay, now. I gotcha. And I ain't lettin' go."   
Hearing him whisper those words made her feel loved. It made her feel like she had a least some importance to someone, and they weren't going to leave. Finally. She finally felt appreciated.   
Joel laid down with her in his arms, her head resting on his chest. She listened to his heartbeat and relaxed. She was next to him, with him, being cared for by him. She felt her heart flutter with joy and love, and couldn't help but crack a smile.  
Joel seemed to have noticed, for he asked, "What're you smiling about, kiddo?"   
She looked up at him, and said, "You."   
He felt an immense sense of love and vulnerability wash over him. He chuckled a low chuckle, one way back in his throat.  
"G'night, Kiddo."  
"G'night, Joel." She said, mocking him.  
______________________________________  
In the morning, Joel was cooking the rabbit she had hunted while Joel was injured. The aroma filled the room, and tickled Ellie's nose. She woke up, and felt a smile leave her lips.  
She was well-rested, better than she had ever been in years. She looked up at him, and smiled. "Whatcha cooking?"  
"A bunny." He grinned.  
"Oh, har-har. It was the most I could get!"  
He laughed, and the sound of his voice bounced around the walls and gave a sense of happiness.   
As they ate their plates, each having their fair share of the rabbit, Joel tapped on her shoulder.  
She quickly turned her head, and looked at him, confused, with her mouth full of rabbit.  
He tried holding in his laugh, but it didn't last very long.   
"Vhat? Vhat ish sho funny?"  
"Nothing, I-" He looked at her, and smiled. She was so adorable, and he didn't know how he didn't realize it before.  
"Vhat?!" She said as she swallowed her heaping mouthful of rabbit.  
"Did you hear about the Italian chef with terminal illness?"  
She chuckled at his attempt to cheer her up.  
She sighed and rolled her eyes playfully.  
"No, what happened?"  
"He pastaway."  
She looked at Joel, and died of uncontrollable laughter.   
He grinned, letting himself know he successfully achieved his goal of cheering her up.  
They sat in silence after Ellie's laughing ceased. Joel cleaned up their mess, ready to be leaving this damned place.   
"Joel?"  
"Hmm?"  
"Thanks." She started blushing, "Thanks for- well, thanks for, y'know, being here. Making me laugh."  
"'Course, Kiddo. That's what I'm here for." He returned her smile with one of his own.  
"Alright, let's go. Grab your stuff."  
She followed his instructions, and went outside with him. The wind blowing in their faces was unbearable, and they had to turn their heads away.  
Then, the rippling sound of a sniper roared through the streets.


	3. His Story

She looked at him, fright filling her eyes.

"Get down."  
"Ain't gonna be any use in that," a hunter chuckled through his teeth.  
"I got my guys lined up on each building here. You make one move to shoot, both of you die."  
Joel stood up, and heard multiple guns cock, each one pointing to his head or Ellie's.  
"Have the girl stand up. We wanna see what we're dealing with."  
They all chuckled. Joel and Ellie both knew what he meant.  
"Fuck you, you stupid prick! Suck my dick!" She stuck her middle finger up at them.  
"Little one's got a mouth, hmm? That could come in to be useful."  
"I can't suck your dick if half of it is in your personality you asswipe."  
Joel rolled his eyes at her, but secretly, he was intrigued by her sass. He loved hearing her mouth talk somebody, it always pissed them off to no end. A 14 year old girl showing them who is boss.  
The men chuckled.  
"No, sweetheart, it's not our dick you'll have to be suckin'. It's your precious Pop's over there. We'll be watching."  
Ellie's stomach twisted into a knot. She felt nauseous. As much as she wanted to throw up, her body wouldn't let it.  
"You sadistic fuck. You're sick to your motherfuckin' stomach, ya' hear me?" Joel shouted.  
Suddenly, they were interrupted by one of their fellow hunters running down the street.  
"Sorry Boss! There was some infected I had to take care of. But, I have so-"  
"Jesus, Johnny, stop fucking trying to talk through spurts of breathe and get your ass over here!"  
Johnny was talking to the Boss, the one who was doing all the talking, and the news Johnny delivered lit a fire in the pit of his stomach.  
"THEY WHAT?"  
"That's right. One of those two bitches killed David. Let his body to burn. I bet it was old fella."  
"Put a bullet in the old guy."  
Everything seemed to have turned slow. Ellie turned around, and started running to Joel. She was trying to get there as fast as she could, but time was resisting her to do so. She finally reached him, and instead of the bullet going through his chest, it went through her shoulder.  
Joel witnessed a little's girl body jerk as it got pierced with a bullet. Her limp body fell to the ground, her cheek digging into the soft snow.  
Joel looked down at her, feeling a waves of tears rushing over him.  
'You will not lose another daughter. You will NOT fail Ellie.'  
He yelled at the top of his lungs, "YOU PRICKS!"  
He took out a smoke bomb, and covered the area while he fled away with his little girl in his arms. "C'mon, Ellie. You're a strong girl, c'mon, you can do this. Stay with me- oh, fuck- please stay with me!"  
He ran to a house the farthest away from those sick creeps. Ellie was losing a lot of blood.  
"Come on, Baby. I gotcha. I gotcha." He lifted up her shirt, and prepared himself for what was coming next. "Ellie, the bullet isn't out. I'm going to have to get it with my hands, and I ain't gonna lie- this shit is gonna hurt."  
He was losing time.  
He dug two fingers into the gaping hole in her shoulder, and tried to pull out the broken bullet. She awoke quickly, and started crying the way Sarah did. Her winces and series of uncomfortable pleads rang in his ears. She was trying to hold it in, but it wasn't working. "That's it, it's all done." He dropped the bullet shard and poured alcohol over it. She cried again, and seeing her in so much pain brought tears to his eyes. He patched her up and held her face.  
"Joel..."  
"You're alright. It's all done. I finished. You're fine."  
She nodded. "We need to leave."  
"Not 'till you're up on your feet again. Reckon you need some time to heal."  
"You can carry me."  
"But it would slo-"  
She frowned, realizing he looked at her as dead weight.  
"Oh, Ellie, hun, you know I didn't mean it like that."  
"Seems like I don't know much of anything anymore then."  
She stood up and grabbed her gear. "Let's go before they find us."  
Joel nodded.  
Ellie was taking initiative, which made him proud but frightened him at the same time. She was turning into him, distant, depressed, and not being able to trust even the closest people to her.  
After hours and hours of walking, they finally found a house that looked well enough in shape to stay the night, maybe even the next two. They checked the house for infected, but not one clicker, bloater, runner, or stalker seemed to be in sight. Not one hunter either.  
Ellie ran upstairs, her curiosity building as she stepped into each room, wondering how much nicer the next would look. The house they were planning on staying in wasn't five star, but it wasn't two star either. It was a nice looking house, covered by some cob webs and dust here and there. They didn't mind. They never would. As Joel lit the fireplace in the living room, Ellie was in the kitchen scavenging for food.  
"Holy fucking shit! Joel! We hit jackpot!"  
Joel walked over to the kitchen slowly, and leaned against the door frame. "How so?"  
She took cans down with her good arm, the other one, the wounded one, supporting her body so she could reach the cabinet.  
"We have cans, and cans of food! Canned corn, peaches, Spagatti-"  
"Spagat- Spaget- Spa-" She slammed onto the counter with a frustrated groan. "I can't fucking pronounce this!"  
"Calm down. It's spaghettio's."  
"What the fuck kind of name is that? Just name it pasta for fuck's sake, would take up less of people's trying time."  
"Trying time?" Joel said with a chuckle.  
"Yes, Joel. Fucking trying time, okay? I don't fucking know how else to say it! Jesus, so damn picky."  
"I'm damn picky?"  
"Yes, you. You're damn picky."  
She turned around to him, her arms folded over her chest.  
"Explain."  
"Ugh! I fucking can't okay. All I know is you're a picky motherfucker. You lived before me, you can differentiate the taste between good food and bad. To me, it's just food. Y'know?"  
She was picking up his thick southern accent, which amused him.  
"You're starting to sound like me, Kiddo."  
"Joel. Oh my god." She facepalmed, and then looked up at him.  
"I was trying to be- I don't fuckin' know, smart or whatever the hell y'all call it! I was trying to get my point across that you're picky by, like- Ugh! By fucking using my wits on ya'."  
"Your wits now, eh?"  
"Yes. My wits." She couldn't help but smile.  
He chuckled, and looked into her pale green-blue eyes. He returned her friendly smile with a more loving one.  
She ran into his arms, hugging him tightly, resting her head under his chin. He hugged her back, squeezing her gently. When they parted, Joel regained his more serious look. "Keep searching for supplies. I'm gonna go cook those Spaghettio's over the fire." he said with a wink.  
She laughed at him, and searched the cabinets. She found packs of Gatorades, some missing no more than 2 or 3 bottles. She was pleased with her findings, but her mind was somewhere else rather on what was in front of her. She thought about David, and what those hunters were saying. They were going to make her and Joel do the unthinkable. They never, ever had that thought cross her mind. Mentioning it in her head made her body shiver. She wanted to puke. How can someone be so sick? She gagged and covered her mouth. She swallowed the small amount of puke the built of in her throat, and took a sip of a Gatorade to wash it down. Joel was sitting next to the fire, cooking the spaghettio's, just like he said. He was humming a song that seemed to attract Ellie's attention. He was humming "Through The Valley" by Shawn James. Sooner or later, he started singing it. His voice filled the room. Ellie's eyes became soft, and she could feel her heart sink. He had such a beautiful voice, each note overtaking the last one down by its presence.  
When he was done, she started clapping. "That- Jesus, that was amazing, Joel! How come you don't sing?"  
He face started turning red.  
"Because I only ever sang for Sarah."  
He took the spaghettio's away from the fire, and opened it with the can opener he had found in the drawer.  
She got a wincing pain in her shoulder. It wouldn't stop. The painkillers he gave her while walking were wearing off. Those were the last two they had. "Fuck. Fuck!"  
"What's wrong?"  
"It hurt- It- Agh! It hurts really bad." She fell to the floor holding her right shoulder, tears filling her eyes.  
He furrowed his eyebrows, almost as if he felt her pain.  
"You're gonna have to deal with it, kiddo. We have mo more painkillers."  
"T-tell me a story." She said through her bared teeth. "Please. I need to take my mind off the pain."  
He picked her up, and sat down with her in his lap. He gave her a can of spaghettio's and a spoon.  
"Eat. I'm going to tell you one of toughest stories to tell."  
"What story would that be?"  
"The story of how I lost Sarah."


	4. So Close, Yet, So Far

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm sorry I've not written anything in awhile! This chapter is a little heavy, so brace yourself.   
> Enjoy!

"Joel- a-are you sure you can, y'know, handle that? I can't bare the thought of seeing you hurt and I-"  
He grabbed her fragile little face. "Yes. I can. Reckon I can do anything with you by my side, kiddo."   
She smiled brightly, and moved her body into him. She ate her Spaghettio's. She drank her bottle of Gatorade, scarfing each tasty-o and drink down her throat. She listened to Joel talk, her ears filling with delight. She loved hearing his voice. Although it was rough, gravely, and low, she had gotten so used to hearing him talk, even if it was about the simplest things.   
"She was good kid. She- she was master of jokes. Just like you, Ellie. That's why I always get so annoyed. Brought back too many memories."  
Ellie chuckled, "What kinda jokes did she tell?"  
"She, uh..." He held up his watch. "See this thing?"  
She nodded. "It's your watch."   
She eyes it, noticing the bullet hole. "May I touch it?"  
She looked up at him curiously, her eyes filled with wonder.  
His face flushed and his whole body turned warm, and she realized she had said the wrong thing. Before she was going to say she was sorry, he responded; "Yes. Please be careful."   
She nodded understandingly. "Okay..."  
She moved her hand to his watch, and she could hear him taking deep breaths. She ran her thumb over the bullet hole. She stared at the broken accessory curiously. She could feel the sentimental value radiating off of it.  
"I asked her how she got the darn thing," Joel continued on, "And she told me she sold 'hardcore drugs'. A thirteen year old selling drugs. One of the best damn jokes I reckon I'd ever heard."  
Ellie laughed with him. "Oh really? Are my puns really that bad?"  
"They're worse than that bad, kiddo."  
They both chuckled, and Ellie stared at him. "Continue." She wanted to hear him talk. She was invested in his story.  
"So, I told her it way past her bedtime and she shouldn't be up. She fell asleep not too much longer later and I took her up to her room. I tucked her into bed, and went downstairs to clean up. I was throwing the trash out when I noticed something strange about my neighbor's house. Jimmy, the guy who lived there, was going crazy. I walked in to see him eatin' on his wife. I didn't know what to do, so I approached him. He growled at me. Reckon I got pretty scared because I ran home faster than I even remembered. When I walked in, my baby was in my office, looking at me, frightened more than ever. Guess I don't remember it, but Jimmy must've attacked me or somethin'. There was blood all over me. I grabbed my gun, and told Sarah to stay away from the doors. She got scared. The poor thing."  
He cleared his throat, trying to keep the emotions behind him.  
"I protected her with my life. I killed Jimmy. I would do ANYTHING to keep my baby girl safe. I had to. I had no other choice. She got frightened, and I felt like it was my fault. Her voice- it was, it was low, or something. Like she was traumatized of what she saw. 'Y-you, you shot him. I saw him the mornin'.' And then she sniffled. She barely even knew the damn guy and she was about to cry. I grabbed her hand and rushed out to Tommy's car. We tried drivin' out of Austin but the roads were blocked. We got into a car accident, and she broke her leg. So, I carried her. Jesus, she was so scared. Everywhere, just, everywhere, there were people gettin' torn apart by runners. It was all a big blur, but I told Sarah to keep looking at me. I wanted to make sure she was okay. Anyway, we got blocked at one point and had to use shortcut, which separated Tommy from Sarah and I. I ran, ran from those fuckin' things. Damn them. And then, the one person in the world that I hate the fucking most, showed up. He was ordered to kill us..."  
His voice trailed off. She could tell this was his breaking point. "Joel, it's okay, you don't have to continue."  
He did anyway. He wanted her to know what had been buggin' him for so long.   
"He shot her, not me. I didn't move fast en-" His voice broke from the amount of sorrow he had lodged in his throat. "Fast enough. Two bullets hit her side. I tried to-" Tears started erupting from the corners of his eyes, trailing down his face.  
"I tried to stop the bleeding. But, she just kept cryin' and cryin'. I begged for her to stay with me. I begged and begged..."  
'I know, baby, I know it hurts! I know, baby, I know!'  
'Sarah?'  
'Baby?'  
'Don't do this to me, baby. Don't do this to me, baby girl, c'mon.'   
'No. No. No, no, no, no, please. Oh, god.'  
'Please don't, please, please don't do this.'   
'Please, God.'  
'Oh, God.'  
"Joel. Joel. Joel! Hey! Look at me." She held he face full of hair in her small hands. She made their eyes meet.  
"Listen to me, you're okay now."  
"She died right in my arms, Ellie."  
"I know, Joel. I know. I'm sorry."  
He hugged her tightly, engulfing her in his warm embrace.   
"Please don't, please, please don't leave me. Oh, God."   
He sobbed the same repetitive phrase into her small shoulder.  
"I need you, Ellie. I can't lose you."  
"I'm here, Da-Joel. I'm here."  
So close, yet, so far.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't been too keen on updating my story. Here's chapter 5! Towards the end you might get a sick feeling in your stomach, but please, I need you to trust me! I wouldn't harm Joel or Ellie in any way. Enjoy!

Ellie had her arms wrapped around Joel, comforting him. His head was buried in her small shoulder, dampening her small green jacket. He held onto her clothes tightly, not wanting to let go of the only thing that could bring him peace.  
She brought her hands to his neck, and pulled him closer, hoping to make him feel the way he did when HE comforted HER; Safe. Loved. Cared for.  
And that's exactly what she did. Telling his story was tough, but as he said, 'he can do anything with her by his side.'  
She wouldn't let go. She wouldn't DARE to. Joel needed her, and she would be there for him as long as he did.  
He eventually pulled away, his big, hazel eyes staring into her small, green ones. She cracked a smile.  
Seeing her smiling, despite everything she had just gone through, made him smile. He had such a tough girl, one he knew he could rely on.  
"Thank you, Kiddo."  
Joel rubbed her head, frizzing her bangs and ruining her small ponytail. Ellie swatted his hand away, trying to keep at least a decent hairstyle.  
"Ack! Joel! What the hell?" She giggled, attempting to fix the mess on top of her head. When she realized there was no way of cleaning it up, she grabbed the black band that held her hair together, and yanked it.  
For the first time, she let her hair down. The strings of unwashed hair fell to the side of her face and down her back.  
Joel gasped, "Holy shit."  
Her face flushed, her cheeks darkening with a deeper red.  
"What? Do I look funny?"  
She swallowed nervously. Just as she was about to tie her auburn hair up again, Joel reached for hand.  
He rubbed the top of it with his thumb gingerly. He was gentle with her, making sure she felt as safe and protected as possible.  
"No, no. You look, different. That's all. Change ain't nothing to be afraid of."  
She smiled lightly, and her mind recalled HIS change.  
'BabyGirl.'  
If change isn't anything to be afraid of, why is he so scared? Why won't he admit it?  
Her mind started racing with thoughts.  
'He's scared to get hurt.'  
'He cares for me.'  
'He doesn't want me to die.'  
'I can't leave him.'  
'Does he-'  
"Joel, do you love me?" She blurted. She was thinking out loud, a quality she hated about herself.  
Both of their faces turned a bright red, and suddenly, the temperature started to rise.  
"Well- Ellie, look, I- Shit. I mean- Well, y'know-"  
"Joel! Just, just stop. I get it. No one ever can, alright?"  
She frowned and stood up, applying pressure to her wounded shoulder. She held it firmly, baring her teeth at the ceiling. She let out an exasperated sigh, and turned slowly. She let her small legs carry her up the creaky wooden stairs, and to the closest bedroom she could find.  
Meanwhile, Joel was downstairs, his legs up to his chest. He wrapped both his arms around them, keeping them in their current position. He pondered about her depth question; "Do you love me?"  
He does. He knows he does. He just can't admit it. He doesn't WANT to admit it. But, he has to. He has to tell her, before she leaves. Before he dies. Before she dies.  
He shook his head, attempting to get rid of the thoughts that pulled him and the little girl so close.  
He ate his food, looking at his watch, the one Ellie had been so careful with. She acknowledged how much the damn thing meant to him, and she didn't want to ruin it.  
Ellie was upstairs, sobbing silently. She has been becoming so used to the feeling of rejection. The feeling of being pushed away by the one thing she cares and loves for. She had fallen asleep while weeping to herself. Her body was positioned in the most uncomfortable posture. She didn't mind though, she wouldn't feel it until she woke up.  
Joel finally made his way upstairs as well, after he had taken his time to eat. He could eat fast, but he usually took the time when he knew he had some. He walked into the first room, but stopped when he noticed Ellie's frame twitching lightly. The window had been opened, and the coolness of the air bit her soft skin.  
He shut the glass frames and tucked her in. He adjusted her body, brushed back thin yarns of hair behind her ear, and kissed her forehead.  
"Goodnight, BabyGirl."  
He pulled the soft covers over her and smiled.  
She was adorable. Her nose, her freckles, her eyes; HER. She was the one thing that Joel going, and he would be damned if he didn't appreciate her.  
He heard peculiar noises come from downstairs. His survivor instincts kicked in, and he grabbed his pistol. He walked down the wooden stairs carefully, not knowing what could be making such noises.  
"Check over there."  
The voices rang in his ears. 'Hunters.'  
Before he could make a move, the hunters they had encountered in Lakeside busted through the door.  
"Put the gun down," One ordered.  
The other smirked, and said, "We told you we would watch."


	6. His Name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I promised you I wouldn't hurt them.  
> And I keep my promises.  
> BE WARNED: THIS CHAPTER IS HEAVY!

* * *

Joel felt his stomach turn into a knot. He wanted to throw up.  
How can people be so sick? How can people need and want pleasure so badly? The hunters' crave a little girl and a grown man doing the unthinkable to each other.  
Joel and Ellie are family. Nothing more, nothing less. Nothing in between, either.  
Joel ground his teeth, showing how angry these hunters had made them.  
"Stay here, Grandpa. We're gonna go find that precious angel you call your daughter. Maybe something more when make her suck your di-"  
Joel growled, interrupting them.  
"I hope you rot in hell."  
The first hunter grinned, "Won't we all?"  
A couple of other hunters walked in, shotguns loaded. They walked upstairs, and they didn't have to look very far.  
There she was. The sweet, precious person Joel held dear to his heart. The one these animals were about to abuse.  
Her small frame was twitching, but not from the cold, this time, it was nightmares.

Johnny, the one they had recently encountered not too long ago, barged into the room, grabbing her by the hair.  
She yelped, letting out a squeaking cry of help.  
"Joel!" She screamed.  
Hearing her in pain hurt his heart. He wanted to run up and get her. But, at what cost? The risk of dying? He had 3 guns pointed at his head, and his pistol lay far away from arm's reach.  
'Shit.'  
He closed his eyes, hoping to get rid of the deafening sounds that were her squeals and unpleasant squeaks. However, closing his eyes only made his hearing more keen.  
"Let me go, you fucking assholes!"  
Johnny started running his hands up and down her body.  
"Stop it! Stop it! Stop touching me! Joel! He's trying to-"  
Her voice broke, and her body went limp.  
Memories of David, memories that hit so close to home, broke her. Literally.  
She stopped moving and screaming. The silence was followed by a loud bang on the wooden floor which was her small, fragile body.  
The hunter dragged Ellie by the arm, her body hitting each step.  
"Stop!" Joel growled.  
"Stop what? This?"  
He dragged her down harder, smirking at the noises that was her head against multiple stairs.  
Johnny smirked, and then let out a boisterous laugh.  
"You're fucking pathetic. Can't even help your own lil' sex toy."  
"Fuck you! I will fucking chop you into-"

Lights out.  
_____________________________________  
Joel woke up, tied to the wall, his top showing his chest.  
"What the fuck?"  
Ellie woke up as well, no top, but covered by her small training bra. She was not tied to the wall along side him, but a chair. She was kneeling in front of him.  
Her small eyes fluttered open, and she looked around desperately for Joel. Despite the pounding headache she had just received, nothing would stop Ellie from finding Joel, NOTHING.  
"Joel? Joel?!" There was a scared tone behind her cracking voice.  
When she met eyes with him, she smiled. That smile soon faded. She looked around, trying to wriggle free from her current position.  
"No. No. No! NO!"  
She knew what was happening. She knew this position. She knew what no shirts meant. She knew, EVERYTHING.  
Her hands were tied behind the chair, and she realized what they left in her pocket.  
Her switchblade.  
She grinned, but quickly put on a forced frown.  
She nodded at Joel, silently telling him to trust her.  
He said nothing bad, nor made a motion.  
'I trust you.'

Out came the hunters.  
"So, we see you guys smiling and smirking. Does that mean you're ready?"  
"Fuck you. Honestly, fuck you. You're a fucking asshole who deserves nothing but death! Choke on someone's cock!" Ellie shot.  
"Oh, sweetie. Sweetie, sweetie, sweetie." Johnny said playfully, "We aren't going to be the ones choking. Like we said; We're watching. You're doing the action."

'Reach. C'mon, reach!'  
She was struggling to grab the knife top in her pocket. She so desperately wanted to feel the wooden handle in her small palm again.  
Her face turned red, partially from embarrassment of their responses, the other from the lack of her sentimental object in her hands.  
'C'mon, c'mon!'  
There it was. She had it. It was hers.  
'No time to waste.'  
She pulled back on the latch that had kept the sharp blade tucked away in the knife's frame. It wasn't loud, like she had worried it would be.  
She dragged the razor sharp teeth against the ties.

  
"Pft. As fucking if, you assholes. You're not gonna-"  
She gulped down her emotions, and continued being the badass Joel had admired.  
"You're not gonna do shit. You're gonna regret you tied me up. You fucked with the wrong people." She growled through clenched teeth.  
The hunters burst into laughter, "Like you could anything but suck a dick from that position."  
She barked at them, making a hush fall over them.  
"Watch your mouth before I cut your tongue off."  
She looked at them, anger filling her eyes.

Joel chuckled, and immediately shut up.  
"Hey. Old man. Here's your punishment."  
Johnny rushed over to Ellie, and started touching her once more.  
Ellie gasped loudly, realizing why she had passed out. Her eyes started feeling heavy.  
'No! You can't lose now. Untie yourself and kill them all. Make them suffer for what they've done. For what he's done.'  
She growled and kneed him in the crotch.  
"STOP FUCKING TOUCHING ME YOU PRICK!"  
He held himself tightly, and grunted.  
"Get her."  
A different hunter ran up to the small girl, and slapped her.  
That was all she needed. One more sharp tooth of the blade ran against the rope, and she would be free.  
The slap knocked her back, allowing the knife to drag against the restraining ties.  
Joel growled, and tried wriggling free.  
"STOP FUCKING TOUCHING HER!"  
"SHUT THE FUCK UP, OLD MAN. NOW YOU'RE THE ONE THAT'S GONNA WATCH!"  
His face went pale, a saddened look filled his eyes.  
'Oh no. No. Please. Not Ellie. Not my baby.'

She cut the thin rope off of her feet and screamed. She jumped on top of Johnny, latching onto his tongue, and cutting it off like she promised she would.  
'Kill them slowly. Make them regret it.'

She left Johnny last. He would be the one she would gain the most revenge on.  
After she had finished the other pricks that cluttered the room, she threw on her shirt, and ran towards him. Ellie took the nearest machete, and slit his throat.  
She chopped him up, not regretting anything she had just done.  
"Fuck! You!" She yelled in between deep breaths and frustrated grunts.

'She wouldn't stop. She wasn't planning to. She kept hacking away at a man's face, no, not a man. A monster. Another one that would haunt her forever. She knew he was dead, but she wasn't quitting. She would pay him back for the things he tried to do to her. The things he made her endure.  
And then, she heard his voice.'

"Ellie! Stop!"  
Her swinging eventually stopped, and she turned around, fury in her eyes. Yet, somehow, looking at Joel seemed to have softened them. Made her vulnerable.  
"Joel..."  
She rushed over to him and untied his hands.  
He buttoned his shirt, and looked at the almost lifeless body laying on the floor in front of him.  
Not Johnny's. Ellie's.  
She collapsed on the floor, her little body shaking with fear. Again. Just the way he had found her in the burning restaurant.  
"Ellie, baby?"  
She looked up at him. Her eyes were broken, representing her soul. Her heart. Her personality.  
He grabbed her, pulling her into yet another loving embrace.  
"Oh, baby girl. It's okay. It's okay now, I'm here."  
What she said next was shocking to the both of them;  
"Dad... Don't let them hurt me. Please."

  
'Dad.'


	7. Through The Valley

Hearing the words erupt from the broken girl's mouth made him feel- warm.  
He felt like he was doing the right thing. Treating her like his daughter. Taking care of her as his own. Loving her as his own.  
She sobbed loudly into him, her eyes shut tightly.  
'I'm not pulling away from her, not this time.' Joel thought to himself.  
She backed away from his loving embrace slowly, and allowed her fragile eyes to meet his.  
"I- I lo-." She couldn't do it. She couldn't say it. She couldn't tell Joel how much he truly meant to her.  
A father. Her father.  
"Joel, I-" She wiped her eyes, sadness leaving, but anger appearing. She was getting frustrated that she couldn't tell him.  
"I love..."  
She looked down at the bloodied floor, her hands, and then back at him.  
Him. Joel. Her Dad.  
He felt so much pride that he got to be the one Ellie truly loved like a parent. He tried to be the best one he could, but he just wouldn't allow himself to get attached.   
He had to now. He couldn't abandon the little girl who was so desperately looking for a way to tell him how much she cares.  
"It's okay, Ellie. It's just me, Joel."  
He half smiled, holding her tiny face with his large hands. His ran his thumb over her freckled cheeks, occasionally over her nose a bit.  
She breathed in, and decided to be blunt, "I love you, Joel. And I can't lose you. I can't. I won't. Please don't leave me..."  
His face turned to a frown, his lips giving way.  
"Oh, baby... I ain't ever gon' leave you. You hear me? I promise you NO ONE can take you from me. Even if I had to kill everyone to save you. No one will take my Ellie from me. I promise."  
She smiled brightly, and pulled his jacket into her. She familiarized herself with the scent and warmth of Joel, making cute squeaks as she leaned her tiny body into his.   
一 一 一  
Joel bit his lip.  
They were just sitting there, cuddling.  
'Oh, fuck. I- I didn't say it back. Ellie, don't notice.'  
His words must've triggered something, for she pulled away from him and shot a dirty glance in his direction.  
"Ell-"  
"Let's go." She growled. It came from low in her throat, her new, breaking southern accent mixing in. She was picking up a lot, but not in a good way.  
Distant.  
Alone.   
Depressed.  
Him.  
She changed so fast, going from a 7 year old who snuggled up against their parents, yearning for their warmth to a harsh, cold-blooded adult.  
What did he do that could make her feel like this?  
一 一 一   
They trudged around the snow for awhile, until Ellie's body finally gave way.  
She was cold, tired, upset, and hurt. She couldn't handle it.  
"Joe..." She tried to say, before falling face first into the soft snow.   
It delicately crunched underneath her body. Her face buried into the snow, and the coldness bit the tip of her nose and other vulnerable areas on her face.  
Joel became extremely worried.  
"Oh no."   
He grabbed her small body, wiping away the icy flakes from her hair and face.  
"No. No, c'mon. Wake up, Ellie. Please."  
He kissed her dotted nose, attempting to warm up the frostbitten bridge. He closed his eyes, hoping for the best.   
He held her close to his chest, keeping her somewhat warm at all times.  
He didn't take his eyes off the road, but, he couldn't help it, he had to-  
"Oh no."   
The tips of her fingers were turning purple, spreading to the bottom of them, and reaching her small palm.  
He could only imagine her feet.  
"Fuck. Shit. Fuckin'-"   
He shook his head, and started to run.  
"C'mon, baby girl. I gotcha. I gotcha."  
He was a few feet away from a red, beaten down barn. It smelt like old hay, but that didn't stop Joel. Nothing would. He needed Ellie, he needed his daughter.  
'No rejection. Not anymore. She's my daughter, it's now or never.'  
He placed her against the pealed wall of the barnhouse, and started building a fire.   
Tears started to well in the corner of his eyes. He couldn't lose another person he cared for. He couldn't.

No, no.  
He WOULDN'T.  
一 一 一  
Hours passed. She still wasn't awake.   
She wasn't in her old position, leaned up against the cracked walls. She was safe in his parental arms, where no living (or dead) thing would be able to harm her. Ever.

His breathing started becoming shallow, almost as if he was losing it. Losing her. Losing meaning. He was nothing without Ellie. He had nothing to fight for.  
He needed her.  
He had to have Someone To Fight For.  
Joel's eyes started to heave. He was so becoming lost in his thoughts of losing her, he started believing she actually passed and there was nothing he could do about it.  
Nothing anyone could do. Not even her gift.  
"No... No." He started to cry, his body titling.  
"No... Ellie. Please, baby, I need you to stay with me."  
He rubbed her nose softly with his. "Oh God, please, please stay with me."  
His crying was eerily quiet. Like he was trained, or something.   
He kept quiet.   
He sobbed again, holding her small head against the side of his, his hand placed between her small ponytail, holding it tightly.   
He had convinced himself so easily she was gone.  
And she wasn't coming back.  
一 一 一  
He was holding her too tightly.  
She couldn't breath. She weakly pushed him away from her, but he didn't stop. He clutched her tightly, but his crying was inaudible to her.   
She felt like her bones were being crushed by David.  
'No... Fuck.'   
Her memories clouded over, and it was no longer Joel was hugging her tightly, begging for her to come back, but David, wrapping his filthy hands around her throat.  
"No! No! Let go of me! David! Stop!"  
一 一 一  
David. His vision was getting hazy. No. She didn't- She wouldn't have-  
He's not- Joel's not-  
"Ellie! Ellie!"  
She's alive! She's okay!   
"Oh my god, Ellie!"  
The name David still rang in his ears like a fucking church bell. He could barely hear what he was saying over the repeated voice in his head.

"No!" She dug her nails into Joel's skin, hard enough to puncture.  
"Ow! Fuck, Ellie! Stop!" He pried her small hand away from his arm, and held it firmly.

"Fuck! No!"   
David pinned her down, holding her small wrists with a tight grip.  
She spit at him, "Let go of me, you psychotic fuck!"  
She pushed Joel away from her as hard as she could, still envisioning David attacking instead.  
She screamed at the top of her lungs, hoping she could attract infected. She's immune. He isn't.

Joel grabbed her face and held it. "Ellie."   
His voice was soft and calming, easing her muscles and ridding the tension in her body.   
She opened her eyes to see Joel.   
"Hey, Bab-"   
She pushed him. Ellie pushed Joel's hands off of her face.  
"Don't touch me."   
She weakly crawled over to the fire, and rolled on her back; away from Joel. Away from her father. It hurt, but she had to push him away.   
He didn't say it back.  
She was afraid he never would.  
一 一 一  
In the morning, Ellie found Joel wide awake, sitting in a corner opposite of her. Tears streamed down his face, and he looked, so, fucking, broken.  
He hated himself. He hated himself for not taking care of Ellie the way he promised he would take care of Sarah.  
This was his chance. He was getting a second chance to do right by his daughter. The one he couldn't save. He was hoping he could save this one.  
But, how could he save her if he was too busy saving himself?

Ellie frowned, mentally cursing at herself.  
Look at what she did. She HURT him.  
She damaged him, poking at a weak spot in his heart that was only beginning to heal.  
"Joel?"  
He looked over, his entire face red. He wanted nothing more than to hug her, tell her how much she truly meant to him.  
He just, couldn't do it.  
He was scared that if he let her in, he would get hurt. He can't lose Ellie, or he would lose himself.  
"Yes?" He questioned, his voice, (despite his sadness), thick and tough as it always had been.

'Fuck. He's good at hiding emotions.' 

"Joel, I'm sorry."   
He nodded knowingly, but turned away from her.  
"It's okay."  
He shot a fake smile at nothing in particular.   
It could've been the wall, the floor, the air for fuck's sake.  
Nothing. He was too broken and upset to focus.  
The one person who he had thought he could redeem himself with, pushed him away.  
The one person he had thought he could finally let in, pushed him away.  
The one person he had truly cared for and loved, pushed him away.

"I-"  
Ellie heaved a sigh. "I'm sorry, Joel. I didn't mean to hurt you."  
He looked over at her with pain filled eyes. His eyebrows were furrowed and narrowed, expressing the sadness better than anything on his face.  
"No, Ellie. I didn't mean to hurt you. I didn't say it back. But, I do lo-"  
He gulped down his emotions, and treaded carefully.  
"I love you. Like my daughter. Ellie, I have missed that person in my life for so long and I finally got another chance to prove that I could be a good dad. And I just- I made you push me away. I won't ever leave you, Ellie. Despite the stupid shit that I say. Never in a million years. I care for you too much."

She ran over to him, and practically pounced in his lap. He held her tightly, but she held tighter.   
"And when I thought you died," He whispered, "I was losing myself. Reckon I can't live without you, Kiddo."  
She could feel him smiling against her cheek.  
She wanted to say it. She wanted to claim him as her father again.  
He laughed softly, and said, "Alright. Spit it out."  
"Dad." She smiled brightly, and giggled.  
"You're my dad."   
"And nothin', NOTHIN', ain't ever gonna change that."  
She nodded, and curled up against him.   
For the first time, they both felt happy.  
"I love you."  
"I love you too, baby girl."   
He squeezed harder, but was still gentle.   
He leaned his head against hers and closed his eyes.  
He started singing again.  
"I walk..."


End file.
